An Anonymous Confession

Yea, so I'm a survivor. That's to say, I barely survived. I don't think I'm familiar with a nastier disorder that causes such debilitating symptoms. I knew something was wrong when my pubic hair started to turn yellow, it wasn’t even from my dye. Adam, maybe you had a similar experience. Anywho, I went straight to the ED and showed them the new surprise I found. Well, they all laughed at me and sent me home with the implication that I was some stupid guy. Yea, that hurt.
Well, I put my tail between my legs and went home (so to speak - no Dusty, I really don’t have a tail). That was the MISTAKE of my life because about 30 min later, I experienced the most incredible shrinkage of my life, my fingers had become yellow and so necrosed that they began to diminish. Well, I thought to myself, “there’s no way those guys at the ED will turn me away now.” So, I went back to the ED, and sure enough, they let me stay. To make a long story short, they biopsied my liver and did whatever they do with it. An hour later they came back to me and told me that I had Gilbert’s syndrome. I said, “I don’t know anybody named Gilbert.” They then explained that it was a disorder of abnormally high billirubinemia. –whatever that means. Well they did their thingy and I walked away a whole man or was it a woman (they did say something about gynecomastia). Anyway, my fingers experienced unshrinkage and all was WELL.

I hope this story inspires all.

With great love and lots of hope for all you Gilbert lovers.

--Anonymous